Stress as an Entrepreneur? Why Rest Doesn't Work (And the Hack That Does)

Welcome to the Paul Vette podcast for high performers who know 90 percent is not an option. Rest is not the solution to stress, even though you hear it everywhere. Yes, you need to take rest. That's nice, but if you're a founder, CEO or entrepreneur, you're always on. Because as soon as there's even a brief gap in your brain, what happens then? You're busy, you're building. A new idea, an employee. It doesn't matter, it just keeps going. And then you can say you need to take rest. Or as Ronald Goedemond says, relax. That doesn't work. Won't work. Bound to fail. Now I've already mentioned it in another episode, but I want to go a step further because it actually makes much clearer what I mean by that and what also helps you. Look, the first time I was really an entrepreneur, I had my own pub. I was 20 years old and when I took over the pub, the pub was open 3 evenings a week. Fine, but I thought why 3? You're missing out on a lot of evenings. But anyway, back then those were still the going-out nights, Thursday, Friday, Saturday and then you could just bring in enough money. And then sometimes a Sunday, cool party. But I said okay, I'm taking it over, I'm going to be open 7 days a week. Admittedly with a business partner. So that meant effectively that I was present there 5 evenings a week. But besides that, I was also a DJ. I did that on the other 2 evenings. And 9 out of 10 times during the day I was still busy with the pub. Thinking about okay, how can we improve concepts? How can we finance the renovation? How can we make sure customers come? What smart ways are there to network? All kinds of things of course. So I was constantly on and because it was a pub, in the evening at 7 o'clock the doors opened. I was of course also constantly busy in the pub. You don't sit in the back of the pub when guests come. You don't do that. So until 2 in the morning then cleaning up, having a drink somewhere else. And by the time you're lying in bed unhealthily with a bite of something and some alcohol in you and getting up again. The day starts again and I'm on again. But then I learned, because someone asked me yes Paul, you're always on, you're always busy. But then I thought yes, but I also take ultimate rest. And the ultimate rest wasn't in those 6.5 to 7 hours of sleep I got. By the way, I now know better to sleep somewhat deeper better and not drink alcohol, but that aside. But the rest I took happened thanks to the enormous fun I had. During work I had fun. So yes, I was on. I was the DJ myself or even when I was behind the bar. I was dancing, I was partying and meanwhile I was helping people very quickly very well. Certainly. As a DJ too. I was of course fully engaged to on the one hand let the audience completely let loose and on the other hand play in such a way that there was a flow in it so they weren't just jumping and dancing, but also went to order drinks. There had to be revenue too. But I had an enormous amount of fun and that's where I see it going very wrong with entrepreneurs. They don't have fun anymore. They're always on with serious things. Always seriously thinking about that one problem, about that one issue, about that new idea. Also all serious thinking brainstorm sessions, journals, everything. Now I recently talked about Signal to noise ratio. An idea from Steve Jobs, really brilliant. Steve Jobs said 80 percent Signal 20 percent Noise. And by Signal he meant every day if you have a big mission, you have 3 to 5 tasks that you need to complete for building your mission. And you just need to complete those tasks. Period. Whether you're working until half past 2 at night or not. You agree it with yourself. That's for the mission and you do it. Everything else when you're not busy with those tasks is noise. Thinking about what clothes to wear. What he's really become known for is that he always wears the same clothes. I've been doing that for years. Just dark blue pants and a Polo works fantastically. Which polo doesn't matter, pull one out of the closet and move on. I do pay a bit of attention, but that's already noise. Food, noise, family, friends, all noise. Network, scrolling is completely noise of course. And 80 percent Signal. But we also know brain work, really deep brain work, you can only do that for 5 hours. And if you really have it together really well, 5.5 to 6 hours. And then you also have other kinds of work that you can also do with your brain. Which is lighter work, you can also do that for another 2 hours. But the rest of the day you also just have time left over. And then it's not the intention to take rest. No, then it's to have fun, to have a good time. The moment you have fun, your brain really relaxes completely. Then you really let loose. Moreover, it stimulates creativity, which is really an enormous goldmine for your business. But just go have some fun. I have it easy now, because I have a son of almost 10 months. So I have fun every day. He asks for it. And he gets it too, because I call up my inner child and I have fun like crazy. I walk singing on the street, I walk running, I do little dances, everything. I have enough fun and that's also the reason I discovered this, because I was also just someone who took everything way too seriously. Always looking at things seriously. That makes you a bit of a sour person. While my one-on-one sessions are really nice. Even before when I just gave therapy sessions, I said yes but not standard therapy you know. We can just have a nice time and just have fun. Yes, but it's about a serious problem. Yes, I always think differently about that. Because for the person experiencing a problem, a problem is serious, but not for me. I see it as something that's solvable, so then it's not a serious big problem. That's why you come to me too because I think it's solvable. Right? Yes, I already had fun in sessions too. And now that I do that more with my son, I notice that my brain is actually much more relaxed. And that at the moments when I need to be sharp, I seem even sharper. Maybe also has to do with a good omega 3, omega 6 balance, good nutrition, training. And simply because I have a son, I have less time. So more actually needs to happen in less time, because I have a mission. I want to help 1,000,000 people to their highest potential. Well, I'm not there yet. So every day I know very well what my 3 to 5 core tasks are. I even start talking faster as if that will finish this episode faster. That's not the case at all. But go have fun again. Just think for yourself once, even if it's just once a day, of something you really have fun doing. And then I don't mean yes, playing some screen games where you're completely absorbed. That's not fun. Fun often has to do with doing things outside or doing things with people. Because then it also really comes out. Whereas when you're alone, it's very difficult to really have fun. Although I also manage during video recording. But still, then you still have to think a little bit. So the question to you is how could you just add a little bit more fun to your day, so that you ensure that you're not on all the time. That you teach your brain that there can be a gap in it, also during your day. Because those 5-minute breaks or those 10-minute breaks you take, if you can then really completely relax through fun instead of I need to rest, I need to meditate or I absolutely need to do nothing. Yes then it's still serious and cramped. And in fun there's surrender and relaxation and being relaxed. And that benefits your brain. It's really an antidote for burnout. And from there also an antidote against stress. And stress, we know by now, is one of the biggest disease-makers in the whole world. People die earlier. My mother died from stress. That's how she got cancer while she smoked her whole life and was an alcoholic. But the doctors literally said it was the stress that was fatal. A friend of mine at 30 years old stomach ulcers because of stress, because of too little fun. Go have fun, have a great time! Did you find this valuable? Then share it with other high-performers. For those who also don't settle for average. --- This transcript has been translated from Dutch.